We choked!

Lexi has always had a knack of eating really quickly, something she’s probably picked up from her dad or uncle Matt, which usually leads to some form of coughing, spluttering, false-alarm choking – and two freaked out parents. You see, Spen and I have an irrational (or maybe it’s rational, but we’re parents so nothing is irrational I suppose) fear that Lexi is going to choke, and we won’t be able to do anything about it ie save her).

Last week, our worst nightmare almost came true.

I was chatting to Spen on the phone while Lex ate her dinner, I was half watching her, half chatting, when i glimpsed over and saw her struggling to breathe. I said to Spen, “Shit, she’s choking” – and I hung up on him (first mistake).

This wasn’t a false alarm, this was the real deal, a piece of paw paw had wedged itself in her airway, and she literally, couldn’t breathe. I whipped her out of her chair, flung her over my legs and started hitting her on her back – seven thuds later, the piece of paw paw flew out her mouth. In the aftermath, she started vomiting, so i had to help her out before I could phone Spen back and tell him everything was ok. In the interim, he had tried to phone me and I didn’t pick up – for said reason above.

As soon as I could (four minutes later), I called Spen, but his phone was engaged. I tried again, same story. Two more times, and I still couldn’t reach him. After five more minutes, the line eventually connected, and he answered in an absolute panicked, hysterical state. I have never heard my husband so freaked out in all the 13 years we’ve been together! I could hear he was driving, i could hear he couldn’t talk because he had assumed the worse (as would I have), and i could hear sirens around him.

Once I told him she was ok, all Spen could say was, I’m going to jail, I’m going to jail. The sirens were those of the Metro Police who had followed (read chased) him all the way home, under the assumption he had stolen his own car. We won’t mention the speed he was going to warrant being chased. Completely inconsolable, he handed the phone over to the Metro cops who asked me if this was indeed an emergency, and was everything ok,  – because they had reason to believe otherwise. I assured them it was indeed an emergency, that my daughter had choked, but that she was fine now – they asked if I needed assistance, and I assured them she was fine. They also offered to drive Spen home.

In all the pandemonium, Spen had mumbled he’d called an ambulance and that they’d be there now. Trying to get what ambulance out of him was another challenge in itself. When I finally did, I called then to cancel the dispatched vehicle, which took about three minutes to do – I explained what had happened, and they agreed to cancel the call out. However, two short minutes later, my intercom rang, and it was the fire brigade, with fireman in tow. I then had to explain to them too that Lexi was fine, that she had choked, but she was ok now. They asked if they could come up and check her out to make sure, but I assured them that she was 100% – as she was now dancing to Teletubbies in the background.

I then tried to call Spen back, and he didn’t answer – three calls later – he eventually picked up, but I could hear he was in a total state of shock, he couldn’t feel his arms and he was mumbling to me. I wanted to pick him up, but he insisted he was ok to drive the 500m to our house. Which he did.

I really didn’t know how I was going to react or what I should say when he got home, except that I was completely mortified that I had put him through all that – and how sorry I was for hanging up on him in the first place.

A vile of Rescue Remedy later, he calmed down and we started to process what had happened.

This incident made me realise some things – that I need to share

• Never ever hang up on a loved one in a crisis – always have a plan of action if something like this was to ever happen to you
• In the absence of information – people assume the negative – rightfully so – we need to ensure this never happens again, and again, have a plan
• The reaction and complete understanding of our emergency services – from the Metro cops, to the call centre who managed our calls, to the fireman who arrived at our gate – has completely humbled me. I cannot thank them enough for the speed in which they reacted, and the empathy they showed both Spencer and myself in a situation that doesn’t always have such a happy ending
• We need to stop complaining about how bad things are – because there are people out there who really want to help us, and will do everything they can to make sure we are safe
• Do a first aid course
• The fierce love Spen has for Lexi is bigger than anything I have ever seen – and it moved me to tears
• I never want to be in that situation again
• Above anything else in the world – our greatest fear is losing our child. I am thankful for every day that we get to spend together, and I will do anything to protect her.
• We love you Lexi, more than you will ever know!

Keep it real!